Star of The Traitors and Dancing on Ice, Mollie Pearce has been busy showing the world just what’s possible with visible and invisible differences. Here she tells her health story, from pre-diagnosis pain to post-surgery strength.

 

It took a long time to get a diagnosis of ulcerative colitis, even though we knew what it was because my dad has it and all my symptoms were similar. Medication works for him, so he doesn’t have a stoma. I was sent away with the doctor telling me it could be this and that, but my symptoms began to get worse. I had planned to go on school camp, so I went back to the doctor but was told I just had an infection and that I’d be fine to go on the trip. I went but was so poorly the teachers had to watch me sleep. When I got home, I fainted and my dad took me to A&E. 

I had a colonoscopy and was finally diagnosed, aged 11. That’s when I was allowed to start treatment. I was often put on steroids which helped but as soon as I’d start to come off them, my symptoms returned. Treatments never really worked for me, except during the year I did my GCSEs. After that, my body just became immune and despite upping the dose, nothing worked. It was a cycle of treatment every six months and then I’d get flare-ups and be back in hospital. 

Mollie Pearce: life before ostomy surgery

After school I went to college, and it was around then that my anxiety around my condition started getting bad. I was having quite a lot of accidents where I wouldn’t make it to the toilet. It was only a short drive to college, and even stopping at traffic lights made me anxious as I’d feel so trapped without a toilet nearby.  

One time on the way to college, I parked right outside the building as I urgently needed the toilet. Students weren’t allowed to park there but I was desperate. Despite knowing about my condition, a teacher insisted I park elsewhere, so I ended up having an accident in the car. I think sometimes as a young person you’re not always believed – the teacher probably thought I was causing trouble. Incidents like that led to me not wanting to leave the house. When flare-ups were bad, I did a lot of school and college work at home or in hospital. Somehow, I managed. 

Unplanned ileostomy surgery

My surgery wasn’t planned. I had a flare-up and went into hospital on a Friday for a quick appointment with my consultant. This was around the end of Covid. I was told I was going to be admitted, and as my colon could’ve ruptured at any minute, I stayed put and underwent surgery on the Sunday. 

I don’t think you can like ever fully prepare yourself for a stoma, but I knew what it was. When I was 15, I’d met with a surgeon who told me what to expect and it seemed horrific. I’d done my research and knew that it could be a possibility, but I would always say I’d rather die than ever have the surgery. 

Then, not long after my 18th birthday, my condition had ruined everything for so long and I was in so much pain, I remember thinking, ‘Get this out of me now! I don’t want this thing in my body that is causing me so many issues’. 

Learning to live with a stoma

It’s obviously scary waking up to the unknown, but I guess it’s just one of those things that you must come to terms with. The charity Crohn’s & Colitis UK put me in touch with other young people via social media, which was so beneficial as a lot of the information I wanted couldn’t be found in leaflets: things like advice on socialising, clothes, and enjoying life.  

I had a curry a week after my surgery – definitely not what the doctors advised! But I was okay with it, and from then on if I’ve ever come across something that really doesn’t work with my body, I’ll avoid it. I’m cautious around sweetcorn because it’s harder to digest but in small portions I can have it, as well as popcorn and things with skins on. I do get small blockages, but nothing crazy. 

The Traitors: new challenges with Sid the stoma

I didn’t apply to go on ‘The Traitors’ (BBC One reality series); they contacted me on social media and asked if I’d be interested in auditioning for a new show. I was doing a bit of disability modelling at the time as I have a limb difference, so maybe that caught their eye. The timing didn’t work for me though as I hadn’t long had surgery and was planning to travel around Greece. I wanted to go on a long break to see how I would get on. I’ve always dreamed of backpacking around Southeast Asia, so Greece was a trial run to see how many stoma supplies I needed.   

While I was away, my parents watched the show and loved it, so I was a bit annoyed with myself for passing up something amazing. For the show’s second season, I went for it and here we are. I have my stoma, ‘Sid’, to thank for that: he ensured I didn’t have to worry about flare-ups, medication or where the nearest toilet was. 

The show’s producers were great. There were portaloos on site when we were filming the ‘missions’ [challenges] out in the open. The only time I ever worried was when I wore a wetsuit for a long period, as I couldn’t check on Sid. Other than that, I was just playing the game like everyone else. 

Life-changing ostomy surgery

I live a normal life but it’s easy to look at my social media and think I never feel insecure or down, which just isn’t the case. It’s still a learning process and I still have days where I wish I didn’t have a bag of poo stuck to me. I’m only 24 and obviously it’s not ideal, but my view completely changed when I started to get my strength back and get ‘myself’ back. On one of the first times I left the house after surgery, me and my dad went to a McDonald’s drive-thru, which used to really trigger me because I felt trapped in the car. I sat there and realised I didn’t feel anxious anymore because I wasn’t going to soil myself. That was such a change in my brain, a moment when I viewed my stoma differently. I think I hadn’t accepted it until then. Suddenly I was like, I love this thing because it’s allowed me to go out with my dad and get food. The more those kinds of things happened, it turned surgery into a positive instead of a negative. 

Once I started to view it like that and see how the stoma had given me my life back, not taken it away, I thought, why should I hide away? Body confidence for me was accepting Sid and not being ashamed of him. If I can show people on social media that I am living life, wearing a bikini – even though I might not feel great all the time – it shows that there is life after surgery and stomas are nothing to be ashamed of. 

I recently went to an event for people with stomas and someone fresh from surgery said she’d watched The Traitors after waking up from surgery. She couldn’t believe I was able to jump across pontoons in one of the missions, falling over, getting back up and carrying on. At the time, she didn’t realise stomas don’t have nerve endings, so I didn’t feel anything when I fell over! That’s what you need to see: someone like you, living life after going through the same thing. I wish I’d had that – I wouldn’t have felt so scared. 

I think we can always have more representation, on TV, in books or in magazines. When we walk into shops, we should see models with limb differences, stoma bags, visible illnesses, everything. Things have changed so much over the years, but there’s more we can do. When we’re asking for something as small as a shelf in a toilet, it just seems ridiculous that it can’t be done. 

Celebrating hidden and visible differences

I don’t really struggle with my limb difference [on her right hand]; I can do everything. Anyone with a limb difference knows that whatever the case, you just adapt, learn your own way to do things. After having a stoma bag for a few weeks, I had it down in terms of emptying and changing. 

People can be hard on themselves after surgery but give yourself a minute and if you feel upset, let it out. Life will get better and a stoma bag does not define you. You are still lovable and desirable. You can have a full life with a stoma bag. It does not change that. For me, a massive thing was being open with my family and friends about how I felt on my down days as well as my good days, and knowing they were always there for me.  

You can follow Mollie on Instagram and TikTok